the gigantic sieve!!

Its strange how light of all colours when mixed together should give you white... and when all of it is removed you get black...

The dusk fascinates me... seems like theres a gigantic sieve draining the sky of its hues ... slowly... very very slowly... Its amazing how after the orange and the red theres only black.. and black for a really long time...

What surprises me is that when dawn sets in.. the same orange and red should seep in first... and then theres white!!!! Its bright again!!!

NATURE and its ways... its too strong!!!

Sunrise!!!!

The little drops of dew shone like crystals strewn in an expanse of green... the fresh green... full of life... The blades of grass seemed to speak to each other in chirpy tones... I felt guilty as i walked across the fields... guilty that i may be inflicting pain on a life condemned to silent speech...

The little stream meandered through the green slowly like an endless silvery orange serpent.. The rising sun draped the stream in robes of orange... The crimson of dawn diffused into the black of the night... The otherwise furious sun seemed so calm and harmless...

The wind whistled across the little stunted trees... The leaves rustled gently as if to acknowledge the coldness of the western wind...

The occasional chirping of the birds interrupted the silence of the dark... The black slowly faded into light.. orange and then to white... so slowly... yet so surely...

So strong are the ways of nature... so compelling are its forms... the most sublime thoughts are lent a shape!!!

If only Adam hadn't eaten the forbidden fruit!!!!

Kill or be killed!!

My eyes dilate..brows wrinkle.. Thoughts rush through a confused mind. My ears feel cold with little droplets trickling down the sides.. A steely resolve grips my heart.. The desire to break out of myself manifests itself in an urge to challenge the sturdy hands that supress my identity.. A dry tongue lends voice to the screams of my heart.. "I can't wait to be free"

The long years of pain and suppression have chained me to the ground.. groveling on the murky mire waiting for the sands to cover the mortal mess. Not no more!! The hardened heart waits no more!! The weakened body holds no more!!

My frail hands clutch the steel. "Will there be light??", " Is this the chosen moment?"
Staggering to my feet, I hold aloft the silvery streak.. The arms feel a strength they haven't felt before. My legs suddenly seem sturdy.. The diffused thoughts give way to a clear resolve.. Aa resolve to fight.. Of blood and gore i fear no more..

The chains cannot keep me down no more... The decision is made.. "Kill or be killed"
Oh yes... the sun shines bright...

Bangbangbang!!!!!

I came across this absolutely whacky arbit flash thingie while surfing the net!!! I mean the arbitness beats me for words....

I this this is a must watch!!! Good laugh !!!


add this to your site!

Go Goa

In march 2007, 4 totally vella fellows decided to take off to Goa to beat the stress at college!!!
It was a spontaneous decision and none of us would have even imagined that it would happen considering the circumstances... but well it did happen!!! and what a trip it turned out to be...

I had been to goa 5 times before this but this was by far the best trip to that place ever!!!! Zzanzan managed to capture some of those sooper moments on his handycam... and we managed to come up with this video!!!

In case you are having difficulty viewing the video... you can access the same here

The omelette and the milk!!!!

Ive always wanted to cook something for myself... Ive tried a million times but have failed miserably... even the tea i make turns into some weird brown-black suspension... Mom tried a million times to teach me how to make at least the bare essentials but even she threw up her hands and gave up... Not only that.. she denied me entry into the kitchen...

I however managed to find an ally in Mansij... we would try to make all kinds of "exotic" dishes and would end up making some other "exotic" dish!! After surveying the mess, I would conveniently say "bye bye" while he not just had to clean up but also finish off the delicacies ...

However last week Vinayak and i managed to make our first successful omelette.... scrambled eggs actually... but none the less it was edible!! :)

Happy faces after the successful preparation of the omelette

Good god!!! was I ecstatic or what!!!! I dint cause much damage either... so it was all well.... UNTIL vinayak decided to crave for some milk...

I did not realise that cutting open a milk packet would be that damn difficult... I peacefully slid the blade along the upper corner of the sachet... the milk started gushing out... for some strange reason, i decided to hold the packet tighter. Dammit... the milk would flow more furiously... Just then Ritu enters the kitchen and sees milk spilt all over the kitchen and starts bellowing...

Im more nervous than ever before... more pressure... more milk... man!!!! there was milk all over the place now!!!!
So much for cooking!!!!! grrrrrr....

The trip to Dhanaulti!!

Date: 06-June-2007 to 12-June-2007
Place: Delhi... Dehradun... Hrishikesh... Dhanaulti (Whispering Pines)
Itenary: 40 hours by train to Delhi... weathering 43 deg celsius... 10 hours by Tavera to whispering pines... rock climbing... staying in a tent... rappling... trekking upto 10000 feet above sea level... visiting the Surkhanda devi temple... rafting... 7 hours drive back to Delhi...
Experience: Stunning!!!!!

There are some things that words cant describe... i'll let the pictures do the talking...


Everything was alright until the instructor decided that everyone should get a feel of the cold water... and then...

The guys even rappled... I missed out... i wish i hadnt chickened out... :(

but i did manage the climb.. 35 feet up... huffed and puffed.. but managed!!! :)


then there was the night trek and the bon-fire!!!


Finally... the trek to 10000 feet asl. It was one helluvan amazing trek!!!!



Sweating and panting we managed to get to the Surkhanda devi temple atop the hill...

we had our funny moments as well... more SCARY actually!!!!

All in all... one of the best trips ive gone on...

Orkut and Youtube worm!!!!!

Viruses are getting better by the day... they not just wreak havoc with the comps ... now they even laugh at your face!!!! no im not kidding... THEY LAUGH MUHAHHAHAHAHAH AT YOUR FACE!!!!! what balls!!!!

This happened about a week ago. I had some taken a friend’s pen drive to transfer some music onto my computer. After a while, I casually decided to check my mailbox. I tried opening mozilla and the computer threw a very strange message.

“ I do not have anything against mozilla but use IE otherwise…”
I was quite shocked. “Bill Gates???”

I hate IE. So I did everything possible to get Mozilla running but it was just not possible. I reluctantly opened IE and tried logging onto Orkut.

“Orkut is banned. The administrators have not written this program. Guess who??” Like it was not frustrating enough, a loud gross voice laughs at ur face… I was losing it … seriously!!!

This happened with youtube as well…Just imagine… u have a laptop… a high speed internet connection… yet you cant use orkut or youtube… and you cant use the mozilla browser.

I tried uninstalling and reinstalling mozilla but it was not working. This went on for a week. Today I happened to find the manual "virus slaying" technique… am I excited or what!!!

Just in case you’ve also managed to get yourself into the shit-hole… here’s the remedy:

Log into windows in the safe mode (This you can do by repeatedly pressing F8 button after switching on the machine)

Search for svchost.exe in the system. Look for the files that do not lie in the windows folder and note down the path.The worm does not allow you to access hidden folders. So you have to first change the registry entries. Go to start à run and type regedit

Go to the following path: HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\Microsoft\Windows\currentversion
\Explorer\Advanced\Folder\Hidden\SHOWALL and change the key from 2 to 1.

This will enable you to see the hidden files in the system.

Now check the path of the svchost.exe file. You will find that there will be a svchost.exe in C:\heap41a folder. This folder is created by the virus and has the associated mp3 and the script files. Delete this folder manually either directly in windows or through DOS.

Now go to:

HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\Microsoft\Windows\currentversion
\Policies\Explorer\Run. The key there will contain a path to the worm folder. Clear this key.

This clears the system of the w32.USBWorm.

This worm spreads through the USB port… so to prevent this irritating virus from entering your computer, disable the auto-run facility on your windows and always scan the USB device with a trusted anti-virus.

Im just hoping they wont try to get back at me now!!!! Phew!!!!

Summers!!

I am here in Bangalore for my summers. If the first few days are anything to go by, I am assured of one helluva time!!!
During my working days, we used to get summer trainees at Iflex solutions. We would feel sorry for them cos they generally did those jobs which nobody else would want to. It seemed like it was all coming back to me… Only this time, I was on the other side of the fence.

We were supposed to report at 10 a.m. I was there by 9:30. I looked around and made friends with the other trainees. A little past 10, we were led to a conference room where we were asked to introduce ourselves. This was followed by an informative PPT. So far so good… The fun starts now!!!!

“Sudeep, Elwin and Ahana will be going to CVR campus. The rest will remain here.”
“Er..”
“You guys can have lunch and leave to the other office”
“Er… No we will have lunch there!!”
“Alright!!”

When we reached the CVR office, we were not allowed to enter the campus.
“Hello…. Who are you.”
“We are summer trainees.. we have been asked to report here.”
“Where is your badge?”
“We are joining now. We don’t have a badge as yet.”
“That’s fine. But where is you badge?”
“Duh!!! The badge is in your drawer. You give us the badge.”
“Im sorry sir. I cant let you enter the office.”
“Bhai saab!!! I have to have to get inside.. Understand…”
“No sir… “
Another one of those pot bellied guys came and stood beside him… We dint quite have a chance…

We did not even have the number of the guy we were supposed to report to. We called up the guy at WTR and asked him for our manager’s number. After about half an hour of cursing and ranting, we managed to get an airtel number.

“Sir… We are summer trainees. We are supposed to report to you. The guard does not seem to understand…”
“Er… ok give the phone to him”

Matter resolved??? Only temporarily…

We managed to get badges. But every door had magnetic swipe devices. But the badges did not have the swipe cards. They were merely plastic badges. So we had to wait at every door for someone to pass by. It was quite funny how every wait was not less than 10 minutes.

After speaking to our respective managers, we decided to catch lunch. We walk into the cafeteria and the guy there says.
“Sorry sir!!! Lunch over!!”
“Lunch over!!!! ???? What you talking about???”
“Khali saaar… No more lunch”
Perfect start to my internship I muttered…

We got our login details and the terminals. I sat down on the chair and was telling myself that I should finish all set-up’s and initializations before I left for the day…

I entered the login id and the password… the computer was not logging on… I tried again… and again… and again… The computer was just not logging on!!!

I looked closely and realized that there was no network cable. Phew!!! A series of mails and calls which finally culminated in the operator informing me that the computer would be ready only the next day!!!

Sharp 6 pm… I downed a cup of black tea… and set off homewards….
“Tomorrow can’t get worse!!! Just can’t!!”

To Daffy!!!!

Daffy!!!! He was the BEST DOGGIE in the world!!!! The naughtiest, friendliest and most lovable doggie ever!!!! He was my bestest friend ever!!! I could sit with him for hours. While I would go on and on with my stories, he would look at me, nod his head and shake his tail… as if to say “been there done that buddy!!” He was a soopa doggie!! He could read my mind. When I was low, he would rub his furry back against my leg and look at me as if to ask me what was my story. When I was happy he would jump about with me!!!

Daffy!!! We all miss you!!! If somehow you do manage to read this, WE LOVE YOU!!! You may have left us behind… but you will always remain close to us!!!

May your soul rest in peace.

Raped!!!!

I feel violated!!! Oh Hell!! I do!!
The WAC assignment was due for submission on the 14th at 10 am. Its one of those bloosy subjects where the prof refuses to acknowledge that a printout is neater than a handwritten doc.
"Ink and paper", he says, " Its difficult to copy from a handwritten doc."
Well.. the case was not too difficult... Frankly, it seemed rather straight... I saw everyone around me making notes and I wondered why people were spending so much time on a case so simple...
WAC can wait..

The night before submission, I began to read the case again... this time a lil more attentively... I realised that it wasnt half as easy as i thought i was... 3 hours into making notes and i was back where i started... no leads...
More coffee... more abuses... more notes...
No effect...
I was beginning to get a lil irritated... i was feelin like a complete idiot...

I ran to my neighbours room. People had already completed thier assignments. I asked them for ideas. The pointers seemed absolutely fascinating... but as soon as i got back to my room, i realised that they were very generic and did not pertain to the case...

More thinking... no ideas... damn my grey cells..
I made a rough draft and decided it was not worthwhile wasting my sleep over the silly assignment. At half past five while jogging along for the mandatory jog, i went over the case in my mind... nothing different seemed to strike me...
By now, almost everyone had completed thier assignments and i was beginning to get a little worried.

I hurried back, picked the draft and started preparing the fair copy, promptly incorporating anything that seemed remotely logical... In an hours time i was done with the write up. The solutio seemed logical and the more i read the write up, the more perfect it seemed.
I was proud of my abilities... i was beginning to feel like an analyst.. wow!!!!
I would soon be THE man every consultancy would want...

A week passed by peacefully... then the prof walks into class with a bundle of papers..
"a couple of good ones... the rest belongs to the bin"
I was confident that mine was one of the 'couple" he mentioned..
"Highest in class... 26/40... average score ... around 18-20/40."

I checked my paper... 12/40
I turned it around to see if it could be 26 written any other way...
I read through the case again... I was struck with disbelief... How would a piece of genius fetch just 12 marks????
I checked the comments
"The solutions are structured well... but your problem definition is wrong. You have identified and solved the wrong problem.... "
What the hell... i atleast SOLVED a problem...
12!!!???!!!

Violated!!! hammered!!! ego squashed to pulp!!!
RAPED... yet life goes on!!!!

FCQ!!!!

For the uninitiated... FCQ's are "frequently conducted quizzes" which are conducted every saturday morning !!!

3:30 pm -Friday Afternoon
"Abbe.. are you sure we have RM & BLaw and nothing else"
"We could have HRM..."
"Who told you???"
"Room 8445 ...."
"Fuck man... Mr.XYZ was also hinting at a probable MM test.."
"Seriously?? how many chapters has he covered??"
"donno man.. wat abt DA???"
"i doubt.. he caught us unawares last week"
"accounts???"
"nahin re... he hasnt even covered 2 chapters..."
"ops???"
"oh fuck!! wait a sec... i forgot abt ops.. and ERP!!"
"Shit!!"
"So we could have RM, BLaw,OPS or ERP???"
"Yeah... 9:30 am tomorrow"
"hmmm......"

10:30 am saturday
"abbe... I studied RM and BLaw.."
"bloody... i hit a night out... i did ops also.."
"DA?????"
"I know... who would have expected DA back to back???"
"i friggin slogged all night and the bottomline... well nevamind"
"hmmm....."

Did someone say Murphy???? :D

The pound of flesh!!!

Warning: The hindi conversations are a testimony to my atrocious spoken skills at Hindi.
please carry on at your own peril!!!

Of late I haven’t had the opportunity to blog. But this incident truly deserves a mention…

One bright and sunny morning, Jonnie decide to go to the city. Now city is a good 30 km from our college … so going to the city is like a really time consuming and painful ritual. His cellphone was behaving badly. So he decided to hand it over to the “cellphone clinic”.

Javed, the friendly shopkeeper looks at the phone, “Saab, the IC itself is gone. You will have to change it. I have it ready with me. Come back at 3 pm. Vapas de doonga.”

“Accha… cool hain… 3 pm tak aajaoonga”

Jonnie remembered that his friends were celebrating life by drinking all day on that day. He decided to join them. A little small talk… a little wine… the spirits beginning to soar... and the clock strikes 2:30

“Faaaak… Mera cellphone lana hain… il be back in sometime… leave some wine… damn just when I was beginning to feel nice… “ *mumble mumble*…

“Boss… cellphone ready ho gaya kya??”

“Sirji… er… aapka cellphone Mumbai beja hoon… shaam tak vapas aajayega…”

“Kya hua..”

“Ek chota sa component kharab ho gaya tha…”

“Shaam kab vapas aaoo??”

“7 pm tak aajayie… ready hoga”

*mumble mumble*

“Bastard sent my phone to Mumbai …”

“What the fuck for???”

“Some bloody component…”

“So he could’ve got the component sent here..”

“Er… dint strike me… but WTF!!! Il get it in a couple of hours… Sheily will call only at night so its fine”

“Cheers.. “

The clock struck 7.

“Holy Mother of Christ!!!! Its seven… that fellow told me to collect my cellphone… If the bugger shuts his shop… I’m screwed…”

“Bhaiya!!! Hogaya kya..”

“Saab… Abhi tak vapas nahi aaya”

“Kya bol rahe ho… 7 o clock aane ko bola tha… abhi 9 hogaya hain…”

“Sirji… 10 O clock aajaiye … definitely mil jayega…”

“Yaar, I have to go for a party tonight…”

“Saab… aap kal subah collect kijiye…”

“But my friend will call…”

“No problem… Use this Motorola piece for now…”

“Arre… This is like a brick… How will I carry this around”

“Sir.. ek din ki to baat hain …”

“Fuck it!!!! What a life!!!’

TRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR…

“Faaaaaak… I gotta collect the cellphone… Ive got that damn OR lecture in the afternoon… Cant miss it man…”

“What time did he tell you to come?”

“12…”

“Its already 12… u overslept… Your class is at 2:30 na… You better leave now if you wanna attend the OR class”

“FUCK!!! FUCK!!! FUCK!!!”

“ Bhai!!! Hogaya kya??”

“Saab… Kal raat who type puncture ho gaya???”

“Cellphone main tyre kaise aagaya???”

“Saab… who ladka aapka cellphone leke aaraha tha… Tyre puncture ho gaya”

*super puzzled look*

“Now what????”

“Saab… aap ghoomke vapas aajaiye… 3 O clock tak 100% miljayega…”

“Fuck!! There goes my OR class”

3:00 pm

“Ok… done with this bloody hopeless movie… I hope the phone is fixed… the slimy SOB… Il eat his head off if he dosent give me the phone now”

Jonnie managed to find an auto to take him to that “cellphone clinic”. He had already spent close to 400 bucks on these arbit trips. Two of those with a brick in his pocket..

“ Arre… Is shop ka malik kaha gaya hain?”

“Saab… abhi bahar gaye hain… vapas aajayenge… aap yahan wait kijiye”

“Arre chotu… 4 O clock ho gaya… mera cellphone milega ki nahin…”

“Sirji… il call him up…”

“Bhai saab… aap apne darshan karaoge??”

“Aap kaun??”

“Tera baap… saale mera cellphone leke bhaag gaya aur phir poochta hain kaun???”

“Saab… abhi 10 minute main aajaonga… aapka cellphone ready hain”

“10 minute ke baad main paise nahin doonga”

“Saar… abhi aajoonga”

5:30 pm

“ Sirji … lo aapka cellphone..”

“Haa.. thank you ji…” and Jonnie began to walk…

“Sirji… 500 hua …”

“Nahi doonga…”

“Dena hi padega”

“Catch me if you can..”

With this Jonnie began to run…

The fellow chased him and jumped on him.

“ Saale, paise nahi dega??”

“Nahi doonga... kutte... kamine maa*****“

They started beating each other up…

Finally the passers by separated them… Jonnie got into an auto and headed back to the bus stop.

His arm was hurting real bad… He unbuttoned his shirt. And lo!!! There was a huge bite on his chest!!!!

The man had bitten off a good half kg off his chest.

Talk about love bites!!!!

Good night!!!!

Bloody long hiatus!!!

Hi folks!!!
Im so friggin tempted to say the cliched " Im back ..... and im better than ever"
Seriously i feel so ME now that im back to blogging..
I had lost my account password and had a torrid time retrieving it...
nevamind the excuses... im back!!!
AND THATS THE BOTTOMLINE!!!!
mug!!!