Saturday, January 19, 2008

Uncertainty

Uncertainty is undoubtedly my worst enemy. It keeps me from thinking straight. I wonder what the next moment holds for me... what should be done next.. will it work out.. The concept of probability is only good on paper. The fact that a mere concept should control each and every action of mine scares me no end.

Here i am towards the end of my post grad studies.. On paper im qualified to take the best decisions in the face of changes and fluctuations... On paper im supposed to conquer shine bright in the face of uncertainty... really??

Deep within theres this raging conflict.. is this what i wanted? Is this really what i want to be doing after 10 years? Will i be happy? Will i be doing justice to my education? Is it all good?

The more i think about these questions, the more dimensions i find, and the more there is left to think about... and with thought comes paranoia. At times i wonder if there is really no way to get rid of the uncertainty... i mean REALLY!!! there must be some where out there...

The fact that my friends seem to contradict in their opinions only makes the uncertain seem more hazy... Each contradiction seems to have a valid argument ...

Im afraid all this thought will still get me nowhere!!

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