Thursday, January 19, 2006

freak facial

Of late I have been hearing so much about women and beauty parlours. One of my friends bragged about spending a full grand over just her hair. Another broke up with her boyfriend just because he did not approve of her latest hairdo. My sister visits the parlour religiously like it’s a ritual. One of my colleagues and close friend happened to streak her hair. While I thought that she was participating in a fancy dress thingie as a tigress, the rest of the office was going “boink” over her new looks…
“Just what the hell have you done that your hair???”
“Just…. It looks good doesn’t it?”
I just nodded my head knowing fully well how much damage an angry HR can do.
However I had made up my mind. This parlour and hair was not going to remain woman’s territory. I wanted to dos something to my hair as well. I considered streaking my hair. The very thought scared me. Then I considered shaving my head off. That was even more frightful. Finally I decided on getting a facial done.
When I walked into the saloon I had no clue what a facial would be like. I told the guy in charge that I wanted a facial done. He asked me which one. Seeing my confused expression, he handed me a booklet. Orange peel facial, Banana Facial… blah blah… I never knew there were so many thingy that could be smeared on a face in the name of a facial.
One of the names sounded interesting…. Hot Sand Facial. I know, anyone would
have avoided that name but I somehow found it very inviting.
He politely asked me to lean back while he started washing my face. Then he started applying an assortment of cakes n creams on my face. Man!!! By now I was beginning to wonder why I had decided on a facial of all things. Things got worse… he got a kettle full of boiling water right next to my face on the pretext of “steam washing” my face. By now I was shitting bricks… He stuck cotton on my eyelids and I was only hoping he wouldn’t raze my neck. When he did remove the cotton, I saw my face and got genuinely frightened. I got the guy to click snaps of my coloured face. At that time I was getting the snaps taken just in case I wanted to complain to the cops…
The ordeal lasted an hour. When the last layer of whatever that was, was removed from my face, the relief on my face was unmistakable. Yet that guy mistook it for one of satisfaction, and said, “I told you, you would like it”.
I just nodded my head while I was wondering if there was any noticeable change in my face… couldn’t find any… Only my wallet felt considerably lighter.Guys!!! Don’t ever get this facial thing done…. Trust me the women just say it to get us all hyper…. If the write up wasn’t scary enough im sure the photos will scare the living daylights outta you




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Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Checklist!!!

I was going through a friends blog and i came across a checklist of things she had done or wanted to do real bad...Well i thought id make my own list :)

Here are things ive done which really STAND OUT.
1.Laughed aloud in class and landed my neighbour in deep shit.. lol!!! yeah babay!! ask Mansij about it!!
2.Attended classes without ditching a single day for one full year... yep... nerdy me in class 9.
3.Beat the living daylights outta someone... :D my sister will tell you im strong :D
4.Got beaten the shit outta me... yeah.. that also happened... never mind how...
5.Survived only on water for one whole day... yeah i won that challenge....
6.Gate crashed into a wedding and eaten for free... geez that was fun!!!
7.Gotten drunk silly... ah.. so often
8.Gotten drunk silly and gone back home.. i still remember the look on my moms face...
9.Gotten my head shaven. ... gee yes i have....
10.Grown a goatee long enough to be mistaken foR vertically growing chesthair... not really but you get the picture...
11.Bleached my hair ... yes... some insane trip!!
12.Spent a night on the beach.. on the sands. .. Awesome Goa ... AWESAAAM!!!
13.Slept in class... almost everyday in NITK.
14.Got beaten by teacher.. grrrrrr yeah... dumass dint know i liked talking
15.Smoked up and laughed my ass off for no reason... yeah one awesOme trip!!
16.Smoked up and cried till i slept.. i still dont know why i cried...
17.Missed home... well yes
18.Jumped out of a running bus and fallen down... hmmm.. well some more embarassment...
19.Lied through my nose and saved my skin... well... i do that almost all the time at work...
20.Campaigned for elections... damn sad we lost!!
21.Broken my bones... well yeah... 4 to be precise
22.Read my sisters diary. lol!!! cheap thrills and a million revelations... sssssssssssssh!!
23.Topped school.. er... one more of my nerdy antics...
24.Gotten arrested. well so close... seriously!!! had Ravish not dished out his ID Card we would all have been arrested for drunken revelry on a National Highway
25.Fallen in love... well dont all men like to believe that...
26.Fallen out of it.... well yeah... just like anything else...
27.Got dumped... lol!!! yeah its like ive got "DISPOSABLE" written on my forehead!!!
28.Shopped for Halli Chaddis... Bonus points
29.Scandalised shop keepers asking for condoms with a flirtatious look... geeeeee
30.Looked for my watch while wearing it all the while.... yeah that also..
31.Tripped on an instants notice... yep.. that was Mysore ... Thanks DeeJay
32.Duped a million testers ... ok fine not a million...
33.Failed an exam... not quite but came freakin close...DSP wow!!!
34.Stayed up all night and watched the sunrise ... yeah those days of exams at 9 am...
35.Been to a psychiatrist... almost confused the poor kid,...
36.Screamed as loudly as you possibly can.... geee.... my sister effect :D
37.Taken an ice cold bath ... damn there were no heaters those days... er... ok those places... im referring to NITK days.
38.Missed being with good friends... yeah the senti side...
39.Hated my "friend"... yeah that also...
40.Loved someone more than myself.... ok not quite more than myself.. but well u get the picture...
41.Got taken for a ride by someone.. well nevamind!!!
42.Danced like a fool ..... man!!! that was awesaam.... i was happily oblivious to the fact that I was being watched by my teacher.
43.Shoplifted... geee.... a Queen CD... :D
44.Played in the rain.... :)
45.Played splash in the rain ... Thanks Dumass!!!
46.Quit Smokin up.... ok thats something im fuckin proud about!!
47.Quit Smoking anything at all... well almost there...
48.Played with mud... well i loved it for some strange reason...
49.Been lonely.... WELL... :) *sad face*
50.Questioned myself... yeah almost everytime... and most times i have no answers...
51.Said Sorry and meant it... yeah... and there are some things i still feel sorry about...
52.Said sorry and not meant it .. well yeah most times....
53.Written a love letter.... shoot!!! that was a debacle...
54.Mumbled sweet somethings in an attempt to woo someone... er... dint work... damn!!!!
55.Made prank phone calls... sorry Mansij and Mansij's dad!!! :D
56.Sung in the shower... :D all the time... without fail...
57.Hummed a single song for a whole day... yeah it was "Cos i got high"... man i so loved that song!!
58.Felt likE an achiever.... well yeah but gone are those days...
59.Felt like a loser.... lol!!!! afer every CAT exam... more so after CAT 2005.
60.Felt sincerely that "ONLY hope has kept me alive"... yeah man!!!Thank God!!!
61.Felt like one life is never enough to do all the things u want to do so bad!!!.. well always!!!
62.Felt Jobless.. now!!!! more than ever!!!!
63.Cheated at a game... well i loved cheating my sister at Businessworld... Loved that look on her face when she would be close to bankrupt while i had all the money .. lol!!!!!
64.Lounged around in bed all day... :) thats my idea of a perfect day!!!!

Well thats as much as i can remember... Guess ive lived a plain n ordinary life by all counts... :)

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Floral Scentings

"What the fuck are u doing here???"
I turned around and saw my siser enter the room... er... her room
"Er.. er... hmmm..."
"Freak... you are using my perfume??? baaa..."
"No no... i was just comparing which one is better ... mine or yours..."
"Really... i also wanna check out the difference"
"No way. fart face... u wont get even a whiff of my Jordache..."
"Really .. lets see..."
With that she came straight at me ...
For a brief moment i smiled as i imagined a bull charge straight at me... however the smile was wiped off my face ...i thought i was being trampled by an elephant.. whats worse the "wills femme" thingie flew out off my hand and landed on the floor a little ahead...
The bottle did not break (luckily) but she gave me this really scary look ... one that mixed disbelief with absolute anger... i somehow liked the expression and smiled ... That seemed to have angered her even more... but before my smile widened i felt a pain im my stomach... The damn thing was poundin me like i was a puching bag...
I landed a few punches myself... before momma dearest made her presence felt and brought the fledging WWE fight to a halt...
Then there were a series of "she did it... he did it" allegations..
I walked out of her room thnking i had the last laugh...
The little demon came straight after me and caught me totally unaware...
As i bent over to protect myself i realised something was being sprayed all over me...
The damn brat was holding a rotten women's deo spray in each of her hands and spraying the hell out of those cans..
No amount of "bhaashan" on aerosols would stop her... Then she smiled a contened smile and raced back to her room and shut herself up..
I was late for work but i HAD to change... which i did... but the damn "smell" would just not go away...
I had to put up with that smell for a whole day... God!! why would women want to wear jasmine and rose .... freaks!!!