Saturday, December 24, 2005

Halli Chuddis II

Well i could not possibly leave the "Halli chuddi" episode incomplete... It kinda pricked me.. so here i am ...
Having obtained the material,we thought the stitching would hardly take any time. What we did not realise then was that nobody would want to stitch them. I am kinda spooked by the fact that no tailor entertained the idea of stitching even a pair of bermudas with that "blue stripe" material... talk about tailors putting up their price... duh!!!
Well we initiallly walked into this posh looking place ... there were a few ladies talking to a fiftyish man while frequently pointing to some silk cloth. My friend drew out the chuddy material and placed it before the man... the women began to whisper among themselves... the man at the counter seemed to sweat...
"Chuddies", she said.
"No madam... we dont do this stuff here", he replied
Talk about attitude problems... we promptly put that thing back in our bags and we left the place and as we left we could hear a peal of laughter... hmm.. well whatever...
This continued for nearly an hour as we got thrown out of every tailors shop.Whatever happened to "Always please your customer" and all that crap...
Then finally one tailor saw our sad faces and said ,"Go to Javed Tailors ... down the street... he stitches chuddis..."
With this we began out lookout for Javed... After half an hour of frantic searching we finally saw a board proclaiming "Javed Tailors" in PINK!!!
We walk in there and saw an old man whom i presumed was Javed.We placed the material before him and said "Chuddies please".
Javed did not have an expression on his face at all.He simply asked, "Kis ke liye saab?"
We were a little confused now but my friend very promptly said.."For him", and pointed straight at me.
Before i could say anything i could feel Javed measuring my wiast size with his tape...
"Pair upar karo saab."
I was now taking orders from Javed .... while some women inside the shop giggled gleefully.Meanwhile my friend seemed to be having a ball laughing at me like i was a circus clown.
He screamed out numbers every minute which made me feel very uncomfortable.I felt like my physical self was being numerically assessed... and the whole scene.. i.e women giggling, friend laughing hysterically at me, Javed screaming out numbers and me moving my legs to Javeds commands... seemed like it was straight out of the Mr.Bean series...
"Saab kal aake collect kar lijiye"
"Sure... well no pockets..
"ok Sir"
".. and let there be a huge loop for the naada..."
"Yes sir"
With that we walked out of "Javed Tailors".
I was visibly relieved while walking out of the place. My friend would refuse to stop grinning the whole day...
I never imagined that getting clothes stitched would be so demanding!!!

The Enlightening!!!!!




For a long time now ive been trying to quit smoking.... Today however i managed to catch my friend smoking in one of those awkward stances!!! man!!!! Id rather quit smoking than be caught like that!!! LOL!!!!

Posted by Picasa

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

HALLI CHUDDIS -I

It was a brilliant Saturday afternoon. We had just finished off with breakfast at Koshys...
“I want Chaddis… I want Chaddis… I want Chaddis”, ranted an excited friend
“OK here we go… ”, I was equally excited…
We were about to embark upon a search for the Halli Chaddis.Well I guess il give a briefing on the Halli Chaddis that im talking about…
These are knee length shorts which come in only one colour.Blue-gren-white stripes… You wouldn’t miss it I you were to travel to a village and meet an oldie chewing on pan herding his flock and displaying his tri-coloured ware from under his white lungi… (People... stop getting ideas…)

Well after having embarrassed a Levis sales man the last time around, we decided to hit Majestic this time… We get into an auto
“Boss… Majestic…”
And we were already on our way…
When we reached Majestic, we got off, paid the guy and started looking for shops that may be selling halli chaddis…
We went from shop to shop…
“Bhai saab aap ke paas chaddis hai kya…”
Invariably the guy gave us a very confused look…
“Kya... haan boss… halli chaddis… ”
“What is that??”
“Er… Chaddis that u find village guys wear under the lungis”
“Er yes the ones that have green-blue-white stripes…”
“Nahin boss… we don have such chaddis…”

This went on for about an hour… every shopkeeper was initially puzzled, then strangely angered (wonder why) ad the relieved to see us leave…

“Man!! This is more difficult than I thought it would be…”
“I know...”
“I have an idea”
“Now what??”
“We will get it stitched”
The idea seemed to have a startling effect on my friend.. She jumped up and her eyes were gleaming like ive never seen before.
“Yes we will do that”, she said and we started looking around for some shady looking shop…
Instead we saw the Bombay Dyeing Showroom...
“Hello Sir what can I do for you”
“Er... We need trouser material”
“Please have a look around sir.”
With his he started pulling down all the trouser materials that he had…
“Sir… we are looking for stripes”, she said with a rather sober tone.
“Ah… we have pin stripes as well…”
He started showing her pin stripes in hazzaar shades of brown and black.
While they were arguing about shades and stripes, I decided to have a look at the shirting material…
There it was… blue-green-white parallel stripes… that too not evenly spaced.My eyes lit up…
“Found it”, I screamed,“show me that piece…”
The old man was a little puzzled but he pulled down the shirt piece nonetheless…
Her eyes were gleaming with enthusiasm now…
“That one only … That one only...” she screamed…
Everyone seemed to be looking at us while the old ma was now beginning to get nervous…
“Shall I show u pin stripes to match with that shirt sir?”, he asked in a vague tone..
“NO we found the trouser material”, she answered
“Maam, but that is a shirt piece..”
“That’s ok we want to make a trouser out of that..”, I said with a smile on my face..
The poor old guy was bloody scandalized by now… He dint dare to say anything else.

“ER… well how much of it do you need sir??”
She immediately interrupted,”How much is eneded to make chaddis for him?” ad pointed straight at me…
For the first time I was beginnig to feel the heat now as the old man surveyed me with a smile and said,”I think one meter should be enough”.

While he was packing the material, she said something that left me in splits
“Do you have naadas as well???”
The old man was red now… Very Politely he said ,” No sir… we dont have naadas”.
With this we walked out of the shop with triumphant smiles…
“HALLI CHADDIS are here to stay!!!!”

Sunday, November 20, 2005

post-CAT Introspection

CAT 2003 came... its went right past...
ah... my bones were broken... how could i possibly have done well... *sympathy sympathy*
CAT 2004 came.. it whooshed right past...
er... well i hadnt prepared... well how could you have cleared CAT without preps...

CAT 2005.. YEAH I KNOW IT FRIGGIN SPED PAST ME AND I WAS CAUGHT STARING...

Good god!!! what does it take to get past this goddam hurdle ... man!!! im at my wits end now...
I mean how much can a human being falsely console himself and fake excuses...
I mean i dint have any broken bones this time round... now was i unprepared... but yes the CAT
friggin slipped outta my hands yet again... the only solace... i came close... but yeah BIG DIFFERENCE!!!

Coming to think of it... I think i did fairly ok... much better than my previous attempts (ah.. more consolation)
but i think my best was just not good enough.
Well im keeping my fingers crossed about my chances with the non IIMs but i guess the gates of the IIMs are well and truly shut fo me...

Im kinda getting to terms with the fact that a year of studies has come to nought... While the enormity fo the situation sinks in I guess its time for some
SWOT analysis...

Well what from here on??? Frankly DONNO!!!
circles i say!!! CIRCLES!!!

Sunday, September 11, 2005

What a drencher!!!!

It was a much needed rejuvenation trip typez… the thought of getting to Mangalore, Surathkal and Manipal never fails to excite me... This time my cousin’s daughter was getting christened and yeah I had to play my role as a responsible uncle…
On the Sunday afternoon I suggested we go to Ullal Beach… I had been to the Surathkal beach the previous day but that only made me want more typez… Every time I get to a beach I tend to switch off completely and tend to drift away… its surprising how it happens every time…
Well I have no particular liking for the sea water though… the sea looks majestic from a distance but the sea water is not really my idea of a perfect drenching… I prefer to watch the waves from a distance while walking along the sandy beach….
When we reached the beach, my cousins were all so excited about getting into the water while I had other ideas... I thought id spend some time by myself walking along the beach, thinking about something or the other. Sunil, the eldest of my cousins , however had other plans… he had gotten a Frisbee and he wanted me on the opposite team so that he could target me… (Ah!! life as a scapegoat…)
The moment we got off the car, I told them I would go on a little walk and come back I some time… What they thought was that I wanted some time off to attend to natures call… Instead I took off towards the far end away from the shore…
Apparently my cousins waited for me for quite sometime… and then they decided to come after me…
My cell phone began to play a terrible version of wasted years…
“Hello”
“Ellidhya magane??”
“I’m having a peaceful time near the rocks… u guys enjoy maadi… gimme a call when Ur ready to leave…”
“Were leaving now… come quickly...”
“Yeah and im superman….”
“Don’t be a spoilsport… come quickly… otherwise…”
“You are scaring me??”
“Id doesn’t take much or does it…”
“Anyways… u guys haffun… I wanna spend some time on my own.. will catch you in about an hours time.. Tata…”
“Fine… as you wish…”
I was under the impression that my cousins had relented and had decided to let the kid be. But I was grossly mistaken… What was supposed to be a killer Frisbee match turned into a thriller man hunt.

Deeply occupied, I walked closer to the shore completely oblivious to my cousins’ devious plans… I walked along humming “Life for rent” and chomping away on some beachside “bhelpuri”… I noticed Joel walking towards the other side… towards the rocks… I thought he must’ve had enough of the sea and quietly chuckled to myself…
Then I saw Danny run towards the bhel puri man on the other side… I again dismissed it as a very natural thing…
I walked along peacefully thinking about the college life and all the things that came with it… Thinking about my initiation into Floyd and floydian living… I saw a thoroughly drenched Sunil call out to me…
“Come here right now… otherwise….”
“Ever heard of ‘Fuck Yourself???’ ”
“Ok dude u asked for it… Look behind you … hehehhehe”
I turned around to see two huge bodies… Danny and Joel were grinning ear to ear… I knew I had no chance… they were each twice my size … I tried to smile but I guess the fright got the better of me… I looked a he with eyes wide open… I guess they would’ve been happy had I walked away with them but something within me seemed to reel against the decision to meekly give in… I decided to run sensing that I had quite a chance considering that both Joel and Danny were big guys… I gathered quite a lead ad I felt rather confident… I turned around while still running with both my fingers strategically held up in the air!!! What I failed to realize was that They Danny and Joel were not the only ones chasing me… all my cousins had strategically spread out and were closing in on me… I had no chance at all… the fingers went down and I was desperately running … anything to escape from these freaks who were now chasing me as if they were chasing down a prize hare…
I was hunted down and I was their prisoner of war!!!! The choices of kannada ghaali came flowing down on me… and what was worse I couldn’t even retort!!!
I dint have to wait too long for worse though cos they immediately carried me to the sea and took me as far into the water as they possibly could… All my “appa amma kapadi” dint move a single muscle in their gigantic bodies…
They dropped me right in the center of nowhere where all I could see was water… I bounced up and down like a basketball… and every time I surfaced they dunked me back in with the glee of a Jordan.
When I did get back to the shore my cousins had had more than they had bargained for… Apparently I made the funniest of noises when I was trying to save my soul…
One of my cousins said he hadn’t heard me make those noises… they promptly carried me back to the sea... I knew it was Joel’s way of getting back at me... The wicked grin said it all…
One more thorough drenching… and that was the Ullal beach trip for me…

Moral of the story: Don’t show the finger unless ur dead sure u can keep it up there...

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

More Drunk Stories... :)

9:00 am

“Knock knock”…
“Kaun hain be bho****”
“Tera baap”
“OYE!!! ELLY!!!!!! Yaar tu kab aaya yaar”
With these pleasantries I was welcomed into my junior’s room when I had been to KREC over the weekend...
“We were expecting you this morning… but this early… man u must be missing college...”
“Woh sab chodo yaar …sab kuch ready hain kya??”
There was a loud burst of laughter.. Others heard my loud laughter and made their presence felt… more laughter … more noise…
The boys were very nice to me … they played my favorite Floyd music… It dint matter that it was only 9 am… the guys were already busy doing what they do best…
A lot of talking… dancing … prancing around… burin CD’s... I was on my way!!!
“Yeah babay!!!”

“Abbe u chose the wrong day to land here dude… TCS is here for placements…”
“Does it matter???”
“Well actually it does.. Scores are bad re...”
“No problem man… we will go for the treat after your test”

Two of them were not giving TCS anyways… so I decided to go to Liquid Lounge with them while the others would join us there after the test…

3:30 pm

One of us decided that he wanted o go home ad that he would return in a short while…
So that meant that only two of us were at LL …
“Two long island tea please”
I was a recommendation from a close friend of mine… Boy!!! Did like it or what…
“Bacardi limon… two large please”
This was another of her recommendations… nice nice!!!!
By now I was already feeling that nice feeling… more chicken…
The third guy joined us by now… and we raised a toast to his arrival….
“Three more Bacardi limon please...”
A short while later…
“Three more please”
By now the others joined in… and it was flowing Bacardi…
Then it all came back to me…..
My cousin… oh yes… my cousin… he told me that I was supposed to be at his place by 5:30 pm… I was supposed to be all ready to go for some party… some family bonding session typez... It was already 5 now…
At just that moment I realized that I had received a call a short while earlier ad spoken some rubbish… I immediately pulled my cell ad checked… Yes it had been my cousin…
It wasn’t jus my cousin I had spoken rubbish to… I had spoken to two other friends…
I was wondering what I spoke to all of them as well as contemplating what to tell my cousin when I call him up… both at the same time… the black eyed peas music being as good as it was dint really make things very easy for my thinking…

I fumbled with my cell phone and managed to dial my cousin’s number..
“hello”
“Hello … u called???”
“Abbe... WTF??? Where are you??? You ok??”
“I’m just fine….”
“Yeah I figured… boss everyone will be here in half an hours time… what will you do…”
“Boss!!!! Help!!!!! Bachao!!!!”
“Drink some tea and get here immediately…”

“Abbe Chetan… ask him if he has some tea”
“Boss!! One long island tea please”

When it arrived I realized it wasn’t the tea that I wanted… but I drank it anyways…
My cousin asked me to drink tea… I doesn’t matter what tea it was… lol!!!!

I paid up and prepared to leave… I realized I couldn’t even walk straight… Now the seriousness of the whole party thing was slowly dawning on me… I was supposed to meet many of my uncles whom I hadn’t met in ages… boy!!! This was gonna be one helluva meeting!!!!

I ran to a nearby “good angadi” and picked up 5 bucks worth of mint gum and chewed the living daylights outta each one of them.. Blowing into my palm every now and then to check if I was stinking…

When I reached my cousins place only my cousin was there… he was waiting for me… apparently the party was at Moti Mahal…

My cousin gives me one look…
“U drunk SOB!!!! Go have a bath…. U smell like you’ve been swimming in whiskey..”
“But I …..”
“FU… go catch a shower quickly… were already late… bas****”
I was thanking my stars for the fact the only my cousin was home… I was also wondering how eve after 5 “Super mint” bubble gums I was still stinking… I was now mildly laughing…. It would take me at least an hour before I would begin to feel like an earthling …

I had a quick shower and came out..
“ok the stink is take care of… now wait … Il make some tea… u should feel a little more… er whatever”
“Really???”
“Fu… don’t open your mouth… the stink is taken care of otherwise…”
I got dressed… thanks to generous doses of perfume I was smelling presentable… While I downed one mug of tea after the other… my cousin was spelling out the dos and don’ts…
“Don’t get anywhere close to the aunties… they can detect the smell from a mile...”
“Don’t talk for too long with any uncle... They will recognize the familiar smell...”
“Be to the point with your answers… no adventures…”
“No playing with children… just sit beside me… don’t go anywhere …”
I nodded my head for everything he said….

Boy!!! Was it fun or what!!!

6:40 pm

We reached the party hall… It was huge… thankfully…
“Bandhya…. Naavu ninge kaithidhevu…”
I just smiled as instructed…
I avoided everyone ad wet to the shadiest corner and sat down… I told my cousin o get me some fruit punch… While my cousin was gone one huge aunty spotted me ad came towards me… I was like…
“WTF??? Now what the hell will I do???? No Sunil also… Good God!!!!

The aunty just about reached ear me when my cousin appeared from nowhere and started talking to her…
“Pappu hosa car tokonda anthe… “
“Howda.. Elli…???”
“Toristhini aunty...” and he led her outside… saved again… wah beta..
This went on for almost an hour… each incident closer than the other… Time seemed to be moving so slowly!!! Man every second seemed like an eternity in itself…

When finally we left the place I knew how close I had been to achieving the “Drunkard” tag... Wonder what excuses I would have had to come up with had I been caught… man!!! Close shave huh!!!

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

one year down the line...

What a feeling it is to be back in college!!!! Seriously I never thought id feel so friggin nostalgic.. I mean the moment I stepped into college I was struck by a million thoughts and even more memories… Every block I passed and every path I took.. every corner… every nook… every shady spot reminded me of something or the other.. I was so full of memories… it seems unbelievable now…
I went straight to my close friends room… nothing had changed… the rooms were still yellow and packed with a million essentials… the boys still ran around semi naked and the use of expletives was still unrefrained… nothing had changed!!!! Each room was playing something or the other… the corridor was still as noisy as when I left it …
For a moment I was wondering how much things have changed since I graduated from college…

As I sat on the rocky KREC beach , the entire year passed by me… how many things had changed… Life is so hectic now that I have to actually make time for my friends… friends who were so much a part of my life… I specially mention Ksheetij here… He was my room mate… friend… guide… he teased me… taught me and was there for me … wherever we went we were together… A year has passed and ive met him only twice… isn’t hat sad…

I can actually imagine my friends yell.. “yaar ek aur jalao yaar”… “yaar mangalore chalte hain”… “ek aur peg dalna yaar” and now all I can hear is a monotonous,“ submit @$#@$!@#% by Saturday evening”, “can u come over the weekend for just a couple of hours…”
Damn!!! Some life this!!!

There was right to free speech…there never was a dull moment and never a time when I had to face a damn boring and inexpressive bum shouting orders at me… now all I get is “do that”…”complete this”…“when will you complete that thing I gave you yesterday….”
Damn !!!! some such a piss off!!!

The more I think I realize im slowly getting into the matrix… one from which however much I may try I cant get out of..

man!!!!!

Friday, July 15, 2005

paper towels!!!

Ok this was hilarious... I was at Styx last evening with a friend of mine... After we realised that there wasnt much to talk about we decided to make things interesting by devising a new game... throwing paper balls at each other... We did have fun no doubt.. In fact we had a blast... But then this waiter turns up ..
"Dont waste the paper towels" in a tone which was more like "You dont friggin pay for those"..
I dont know if it was the drunkenness or if we were genuinely sorry ... well we promptly jumped out of our seats and started picking up all the napkins and "uncrumpling" them... then folded them neatly and put ot right back in the holder...
"Happy???" she asked rather innocently...
The waiter just walked off...
I mean we dint even intend to be rude... lol!!!!!

After a couple of hours we paid the bill.. (damn alco is getting expensive) and walked out of the place... the guy at the door was about to ask me if i had a pleasant evening... and i tripped right into him ... anticipated his question and said... "yeah lovely evening..." all the while sporting a dazed look and an embarrassed smile...
"Trust me im sober" i said to which he just laughed...

Damn ... trust i say!!!!

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

I got tagged....

Okay!!! I did get tagged... It was Thetis...

so here goes

Three names I go by:
1)Ellie
2)Elwin
3)Kaunds

Three Screen Names:

1)Sanity_sucks
2)elwin_kaunds
3) blah!!

Three things I don't like about myself:

1) my laziness after its cost me something i really really really like...
2) the "FU" look after ive pissed off someone nice
3) the laughter after ive totally ruined my own chances...

Three things that scare me:

1)my mom when she gives me that look...
2)Britney and her band of imbeciles(they look like theyve come straight out of e zee horror show)
3)me... well yeah sometimes... but im generally harmless...

Three essentials:
1)Dreams
2)Hope
3)Determination

Three things I like in the opposite sex:

1)women give me a patient hearing... most men simply cut me off :(
2)hmmm.. well i like them most times except when they utter the word "Shopping"
3)er.. is it that damn difficult to find a third positive... sheesh!!!

Three things that I want to do badly now:

1)prove Einsteins Theory of Relativity wrong... i say E is not equal to mc squared... i mean it dosent sound right...
2)Hit the pub
3)sleep... zzzzzzzz

Three places I'd love to go on vacation:
1)Switzerland
2)The carribbean islands
3)my college beach... yeah my college had a beach :)

Three things i wanna do before dying:

1)Travel the world over
2)beat my DSP lab attender black n blue
3)bribe the guy who will write my epitaph

Three people who get to take this wonderful quiz (!!!):
1) Jax
2) Shwe
3) Shilpa

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

rain rain dont go away....

I was out at Pecos with a friend of mine on Sunday. We had a lovely time taunting the waiter and making “im so gay” faces at passing “gentlemen”… when it was finally time to leave, it began to pour… It seemed to get worse by the minute…
The friend I had gone with happens to be a total nut… just like me… So I suggested we walk in the rain… You wouldn’t believe the enthusiasm with which she nodded in agreement…
What initially started off as “I can walk faster than you” turned into a mad rush in the rain .. The others who were taking shelter in the nearby shops offered to make space for us but we were in no mood to stop…
“Im the faster one” she screamed and kept running…
Ironically we stopped running only when I was too tired to chase that damn thing… and that was when it stopped raining… or atleast it stopped pouring….
The fun did not end there… the little monkey runs straight towards me and splash lands on a little puddle just to my right… I tried to avoid the splash but…
I tried to give it back… the next few minutes were spent in frantically searching for muddly puddles we could splash land to dirty the others trousers… All the while the passers by were like “WTF????” … our reaction as usual was also “WTF???”
When finally we did decide to stop we looked quite a sight… she had her soiled jeans folded up almost upto her knees while I was running around in a zatang trouser in various shades of brown..
Just before she was about to leave, a brainwave struck me… I jumped on slush … ran towards her and stepped on her feet leaving a big brown blotch on her osho sandals…
The damn rascal got off the vehicle and chased me all over the place and boy did she give it back… grrrrrrrr.. She even managed to get away scot free after parking her bike in the middle of the road thanks to that “look at me im so innocent” smile…

Neways. that was one day when the kid in me was back at its best… and boy did I feel good!!!!!

Monday, July 04, 2005

Purpose??? whats that

I was just wondering about how much we all know about the purpose of our existance… Am I the only one or is everyone around me about as unclear… What am I here on earth for??? What am I supposed to be doing?? Is what I am doing actually done towards doing what I am supposed to do??? Phew!!! Are we really guided by a super power??? Is there a meaning to fate lines and weird charts?? Well I do not know… Are we really the “masters of our destiny” or is it that our destinies are written for us even before we enter this world…
After the accident in December 2003, while I was lying down in the hospital with four broken bones I was wondering why I wore my helmet on that day.. I generally did not wear a helmet but on that day it seemed to come naturally to me to wear one… If I hadn’t there was no way I could have escaped… Is it merely a coincidence??? Does that mean that my purpose for existence is still not satisfied???
I was trying to figure out the funda behind my purpose and it just got weirder by the minute… According to a friend of mine, we live because we have a purpose. This statement kinda perplexed me no end… Does that mean that when a person dies his purpose is fulfilled?? Its ironical that a man should never know what he is living for until he is alive no more… Does a man realize what his purpose his living was after his death??? Well no one knows… I was wondering if a man knows his purpose the moment before his death… the whole concept of purpose becomes more absurd when u wonder if there is a purpose in the first place… If there is then how would you explain the death of a baby before it sees the world…
Well I do not know the answers… But I do know its time to sleep… Good night people…

Wednesday, June 29, 2005

rantings of a bored mind

I was surfing channels on television and I realized how few genuine music channels actually existed… I was chatting with a friend of mine and even she seemed to be echoing the same thought…
Initially there was MTV with all its promises of non stop good music… I must say that they were really good initially and they played some amazing music… Then gradually the good music started drying up while the crappy pop thing began flooding most of the shows… there was not a moment on the channel when Britney and her band of teenage wannabe whackos were not talked about… Their songs seemed to be “music”… well whatever… As if to prove that there weren’t just female wannabe artistes… a whole new clan of boy-bands spawned and they seemed to make MTV their very own hotspot…
“hit me baby one more time…”, “I want it that way…”
All songs seemed to come straight out of “What not to say in Bed”….
Duh!!!
The rockers had very little to be happy about with only the night rock shows showing some semblance to music… Soon even that dried down to merely a show a night… and the reason .. well they had to accomodate variety in the channel in the form of hindi music… well it did seem like an okish idea but somebody ought to tell them that hindi music is not all about raunchy outlandish hip shakers baring it all to the “tune” of some “freak gawaar” turned “yo-punk overnight”….
While the abuses continued to flow in , there was some respite in that Channel V began to play some decent music… well how long could they hold on … with more and more junta preferring “meri beri ka ber” to “Romeo and Juliet”.. even Channel V shifted to airing more of the “most wanted” music…
So what does that leave us with… oddly timed shows with fleeting glances of Lennon and Morrison interspersed with Keating, Bryan, Shakira and the like…. Is there no channel which plays good music???? Damn!!!!
As if to answer our prayers … some god blessed soul launched VH1. Well by far the best music channel as yet on cable television.
Although VH1 is my favourite music channel as of now… there still are some reservations . Whenever I switch on the channel I seem to run into some big man calling himself 50 cents ranting some know-nothings in a "now-beat-it-punk" hurried .. low amp voice… Id have to wait a good 10-15 minutes before I get to hear what I was hoping to hear…
The point im trying to drive home here is that its time we came up with music channels specific to an audience… I think VH1 has taken a step towards catering to the English music audience… I personally feel that its time there is a separate music channel for the die hard rock fans… one for the fans of the ever so fast speaking rappers and one even for all the hip shaking, pelvic thrusting , booty baring bimbettes…
Till then my computer and my ever increasing collection of music shall be my company…

Ps: these are solely my and only my views… Peace!!

Sunday, June 26, 2005

hold on

I just happened to watch the video of this song called "Hold on" by "Good Charlotte". By the time they had finished, I was pretty disturbed.. The song is an anti suicide song written in response to all the kids who wrote letters to the band about how bad their lives had been and how they felt about living a hopeless life.The video shows fathers,mothers,brothers,sisters,friends talking about the dear ones they had lost.. I was particularly touched by an old man saying " This not the order of nature.. parents dont bury their children .. children bury their parents...". There also is a girl who says that she is happy to be still living...


This world, This world is cold
But you don't, you dont have to go
You're feeling sad, you're feeling lonely
And no one seems to care
Your mothers gone and your father hits you
This pain you can not bare

But we all bleed the same way as you do
And we all have the same things to go through

Hold on, if you feel like letting go
Hold on, it gets better than you know

Your days, you say they're way too long,
And your nights, you can't sleep at all
Hold on
And you're not sure what you're waiting for
But you dont want to no more
You're not sure what you're looking for
But you dont want to no more

But we all bleed the same way as you do
And we all have the same things to go through

Hold on, if you feel like letting go
Hold on, it gets better than you know
Don't stop looking you're one step closer
Don't stop searching its not over
Hold on

What are you looking for?
What are you waiting for?
Do you know what you're doing to me?
Go ahead...what are you waiting for?

Hold on, if you feel like letting go
Hold on, it gets better than you know
Don't stop looking you're one step closer
Don't stop searching its not over

Hold on, if you feel like letting go
Hold on, it gets better than you know
Hold on



I was really touched by this song ... I mean there were so many moments when I thought that life was just not worth living.. So many moments when I thought that I wasnt good enough for this world... So many times when I got so close to the edge..
There were times when i felt that there's nothing to do but just give up and cave in.It felt like my life was not heading where it was supposed to be ... I felt like a loser and the future didnt seem like it held too much promise for me either... Looking back now I thank my stars I didnt give up... I know how close I came to the edge and I know how bad things could have gotten. It might have seemed like THE answer then but I know now that it wasnt...
Thinking about those times kinds shakes me up but I know that I would'nt have been as strong as I am had I not been faced with those hard choices.. I KNOW that I was not dastardly .. I know that there is a purpose... and most importantly I KNOW that there are the special people who really care...

Saturday, June 11, 2005

the cigarette that wasnt to be ... :)

Something weird happened to my friend that deserves a mention on my blog… Its not just strange but outright funny..
Ajay was out on Brigade road to have a good time. While his girl friend was busy shopping in one of the shops in the mall, he decided to have a quick smoke.The fellow found a crowded shack and managed to squeeze his way through the crowd ..
“Ek kings dena yaar…”
He tried to light the cigarette but the crowd was all over him.So he decided to get out of the place and then light the smoke stick. It took him a while to get out but when he did he realised that he had left his cigarette lighter back home… he looked around for some one with a a match but found nobody…
He struggled his way back into the shady shop and managed to light the fag with much difficulty.Another struggle and he was out of the shop.He was sweating and it had been almost fifteen minutes since he had left his girlfriend in the mall and come out looking for a cigarette. For a man who cannot spend an hour without a cigarette ,the relief was quite obvious.
Just as he was about to leave, a big man walked up to him and asked him for his lit cigarette. Ajay thought that the man was wanting to light his fag and so he gladly ofered it to him. The big man just said “Thanks, and walked away. Ajay trailed the man hoping that the man would give him back the cigarette. One puff, two and then another.. the man kept walking… He turned back , saw Ajay and asked
“ Dude, any problem?”
“My cigarette…. ”
“I thought you gave it to me…”
“I though u wanted to light your cigarette…”
“Well do you want it back then??”
“Eh.. ah.. er… no its ok … “
Ajay walked back to the mall… It was a good twenty five minutes since he had left his girlfriend at the mall. Now he would have to listen to her ranting and whats worse he hadnt even fagged… lol!!!!

Friday, May 20, 2005

Encounters of a different kind :)

Ah a little more about the fateful Ooty trip
We had gotten to Mysore when we kinda lost our way .. We had to get to Nanjangud and somehow every road from there seemed to head towards Bangalore.
We looked around for people to help us out but we could not find any… we decided to toss a coin and decide one direction and drive along that direction until we found someone or something that would direct us to Nanjangud… We did not have to drive too far actually… a little ahead we saw a middle aged man ambling along…
Elated at having found signs of life … we drove towards him and stopped the car beside him… He was a big man .
“ Sir, how do we get to Nanjangud”
There was a brief silence and then without a warning he opens the back door and gets into the car. We were visibly psyched.
“Oye, WTF??? What are you doing?”
No reply.. The man was making himself comfortable in the back seat. DJ and I jumped out of the car and tried to get the big man out of the car… There were no passers by and there was no way we could drag the mighty mass out of the car..
“DJ what if that fuck face has a knife or something?”
“Dude.. what should we do.. Shall we drive straight to a police station?”
“No man.. if we get to some place where we see enough people ..we will make some noise”
“But what if the bastard has a knife or something…”
We Peeped into the car and we realised that the man was druk.. he was enjoying his isesta in our car…
“Dj we will drive on… It’s the only thing we can do now.”
We got back into the car… I carefully pulled our bags from the rear area while DJ just drove on…
After two minutes of driving, the big man broke the deafening silence..
“Take a right here..”
I was carefully surveying the man for any signs of a knife or gun…
He said, “ I want to go to Nanjangud myself. I know the way. Theres no bus..I have to get there urgently”
We stayed silent but decided to take the right turn.
We kept driving and up ahead we saw a board “ NANJANGUD –22KM”
We looked around to find some people … only a few scattered shepherds and their goats…
The man tried to make conversation with us but we just stayed silent …
I decided to stay alert and sit ready to pounce in case I wiuld have to.
DJ was petrified now.He is never silent.. and to see his mouth closed for such a long time was really rare and it made me feel uncomfortable.
“Sir, I amd unemploeyd. Are you working?”
we stayed silent.
“I am married and I do not have money .Can you help me please.”
I was getting a little scared now. He was eginning to talk about money. Several thoughts raced across my mind. Is he harmles… Does he have more people waiting for us… Are we screwed???
The man was talking non stop now describing his sorry tales and trying to elicit some sympathy . We on the other had were trying our best to not freak out.
After driving for almost twenty minutes we reached a place where there seemed to be more people.
DJ atopped the car.
“Get out of the car”
“Sir please give me some money”
“Look we will just scream now . You better get out of the car now”
“Give me some money… You will be helping….”
“Dude get the fuck out of here before I scream my lungs out”
DJ was beginning to take a deep breath and was getting ready to give a shrill cry for help…
The mans lowly got out of the car. We were as alert as we could be.
Then he comes slowly towards my window and thrusts his hand into the car.
“Thanks for dropping me here”
I was freaked out… DJ started screaming.
The man looked cofused and he went away.
We drove really fast from there and after we had covered about forty kilometres we stopped the car . We spoke for the first time since we had dropped the man off near Nanjangud.
“Do u think the man was really harmless”
“I don’t know . Maybe he got scared of the people…”
“Maybe he was just plain drunk”
“You mean he dosent know he might be 22 kilometres from Mysore”
We laughed out aloud at the thought of having been fooled by a drunken moron .We laughed louder at the thought of leaving a drunken man twenty odd kilometres from his home… Man!!! But I still wonder … Why me?????



On a glorious trail :) Posted by Hello


THE MAN and THE CAR... on the way to OOTY... :) Posted by Hello

Sunday, May 08, 2005

Duped by damn strawberr-man.

It was our first day in Ooty……
We were two guys in a car trying to make the most of a long weekend… The drive was tiring but worth it . The scenes that met our eyes were mind boggling to say the least. The weather was absolutely brilliant. We could sip hot chai in the open at 2pm on a summer afternoon….
We had all the time in the world and nothing else to do than to roam the rugged streets and ogle at the few pretty dames… Dhananjay suggested that we drive up a certain hill which was overlooking the greater part of Ooty…. I initially disregarded the idea as impractical but within an hours time… sheer joblessness drove us to the point of impracticality!!! Yeah baby!!! we did drive up afterall….
The drive up was along an extremely narrow stretch . The road was just about broad enough to permit one car .. One wrong move at the curves and we could well be history… We managed the drive pretty comfortably until we reached the point where the roads got much steeper . One man jumps right into our way.We brake hard to avoid the man. I even jumped out of the car and uttered choicest kannada abuses at him . He seemed rather bewildered at my expressiveness…. He made the most of the opportunity though and thrust a box of strawberries into my face …
“Organic strawberries sir….”
“Nahin chahiye yaar….”
“ No saar… good strawberry… made in India… very sweet… no fertilizer… no chemical… only natural”
“Nahin chahiya yaar…..”
“No sir … u no understnding… red strawberry… red inside also… see….”
And he bites into one amd proudly displays the insides….
“ see I told you sir… its red”
By now… DJ got out of the car , amused by the bald mans antics…
“Ok boss… how much is it???”
“Only 100 Rupess sir…”
“What the f***!!!! ”
“Organic sir… 20 strawberry sir…. Cheap…”
“ CHEAP MY FOOT!!!!! Five bucks an organifc strawberry???”
“no sir 20 strawberries only 100 rupees”
We were considering our options.. we could go on and on … the man would also go on n on.. we would never get anywhere.He was blocking the road.We couldn’t possibly drive any further without buying his strawberris.We couldn’t reverse either because the road was not wide enough to allow us to reverse .So in a way he strategically forced us into buying the strawberries…
We just about kept the strawberries in the car when our man reappears … this time with organic strawberry jam….
Man … another fifteen minutes of haggling and we were sitting in the car eating strawberries with strawberry jam…. All for rupess one hundred and fifty vonley!!!!! The drive to the top from there on was smoth… the scene from up there was absolutely amazing. We sat there for a long time feasting on chips and biscuits and the organic strawberries…
The drive downhill was less eventful.We reached the foothills in about half an hour.Of course this time we were careful enough to speed past the place before Mr. Organic Strawberry caught us again….
Conning is an art. Some people do it with flair while some just force the victim into submission… Getting conned just happens… only that with me it happens all the time… damn!!!!

Saturday, April 16, 2005

my first interview.. :(

It was the second day of campus recruitment ... It was the turn of a huge company, with BIG market credentials, to woo the students on that day.... everyone was visibly excited... there were hazzaar rumours...

"Oye, i heard that they are coming for mass recruitment da...."
"no da... they will pick a few but they are paying big.. really big ..."
"hey heard they are setting up a new fab in Timbuktoo… they need people …. Might even pick a hundred…"


The pre placement talk was scheduled for 2 pm.. Everyone was slogging since the previous three days preparing for all possible questions the freaks may ask…
Some resourceful fellows even managed the qualifying papers from their friends in IITM where the company had just been before they landed in Surathkal. The typical Krecian Jugaad was to be seen everywhere… the zerox shops had queues of guys tryin to get a copy each of the probable questions… while back in the blocks the control c and control v keys were being used overtime…
When I stepped into to the mess for lunch,it was surprisingly empty… hardly anyone was there… everyone was apparently studying for the qualifiers…. I was wondering if I stood a chance at all…

At 2 pm I found myself sitting in the front row in the ATB…. I was listening attentively to all the crap they had to say..
"We are world leaders in….we can do that … this and the other… we are the best… "
[so??]

After all the ranting about their company, they decided half an hour of bragging was good enough…They finally revealed the package… it was a pretty huge pay-pack by all standards… so we were kinda excited about the entire thing…

Immedaitely after, they announced the rather high cut off which I barely cleared and then they started distributing the papers….
The paper was not the one that everyone had got from IITM… The company had lived up to its name… the faces of the students clearly lost a shade or two… all their efforts had gone waste…. Even I was a little flustered as it was only my second apti [thats what we called it]

Although I cleared the apti paper with ease… the technical section was a total bomb… it was hopeless trying to answer that paper… it was near impossible for anyone to crack that paper…

After an hour and a half I slowly trudged out of the hall.. everyone was clearly disappointed… the long faces said it all…[log long faces... some sight..]

The results were scheduled to be out round about 5 pm… and I had no hope whatsoever of qualifying for the interviews … so I decided to go to the adda… our very own “Krishnas” for my cup of tea…. I didn’t realise how time flew by and before I realised one of my friends came running towards me…

“Abbe tera naam list main hain…”
For a moment I did not undrstand what was going on…
“abbe jaldi chal yaar… tera interview bees minute main hain….”

I was in a state of shock… I had not expected in the least to have qualified…
I got up and ran towards the hostel… somehow I felt that having cleared the difficult test,I would sail through the interview ... [hopes...]

I dressed up hurriedly yet immaculately in my new pair of formals et al… I hurried towards the Placement centre… the light drizzle which was so common during those placement days slowly turned into a heavy shower… when I reached the placement centre I was wet … I did not even have a minute to breathe easy… Before I could gather by breath I realised I was in a small room , wet and panting before a young man who did not look too pleased with my presentation skills…
After briefly introducing myself I told him a little about my interests and my favourite subjetcs… He listened very patiently and then said…
“You are an electronics student eh… hmm… I do not know much of electronics but I will try to ask you something… ”
with this he started my technical interview… he asked me a couple of questions on electronics and then “What are the programming languages you know???”
“C sir”
“only C??”
“yes sir… we had only C in our syllabus”
“no C++ also??”
“no sir”
“hmmm… fine il give you a piece of code … tell me… " blah blah
“ ok sir”… blah blah..
[but I managed to give him the correct answers… and i was feelin really really good now]
“ tell me something about OOPS..”
“Object Oriented Programming sir”,I said with a gleam in my eye…
“what is that???”
“well I don’t know … but …”[WTF?? how am I suppposed to know??]
“u don’t know object oriented programming???”
“no… we dint have that in…”
“ok.. do u know a bit of Java??” [yeah rt!!!! ]
“No sir..”
“PL/SQL… data base management???”
“No sir…” [oye... dude im an electronics engineer]
“What else do u know in computers??”
“I know how to work on matlab , pspice VHDL n verilog…”
“what is that????? But u do not know OOPS concepts eh??”
[not again... ]
“No sir…”
“hmmm……. Where are you actually from??”
I realised that my interview ended there… I did not know what to do… I was so shaken up by the whole experience…
“ sir .. from Bangalore..”
“I am sorry Elwin but we are looking for highly technical computer guys”
I was about to scream, “Do I look like a friggin imbecile to you??”… but I managed to keep it down to a mumble…
“Thank you” I said and walked out….
That was my first interview… the results,negative and the after effects,still showing…

Sunday, April 03, 2005

Answers????

Yesterday my cousin passed away. He was the liveliest of all my cousins… and I still cant believe that he is no more. Some say that it was stress at work while others say that it was a freak accident.Whatever it was,we will all miss this man who always brought a smile on our faces.
He was true to his name ,Joy, ever smiling and armed with a repertoire of underworld jokes... I miss him sorely. Even as I sat at the funeral service, many tens of people: friends, relatives and colleagues walked up and testified the glowing influence Joy had on them.I was wondering what an influence this man had on me... He taught me that life isn’t that bad... that it is NEVER bad enough to stop smiling... He may have joked and smiled away everything but deep inside he was as determined as ever, yet not stubborn... He would not let anyone control his life… He was the master of his life. He taught me how to live life to the fullest.
Even at the grave I was hoping that this was all one big joke … that he would rise up and laugh that hearty laugh which all of us admired…. But it was for real… I lost one of my closest friends and beloved cousin.
After everyone had left, I stood there and wondered, "what next???". Is this the end for Joy??? Or is it the beginning of a new life? Is there anything at all after this??? Does he even know that we miss him so sorely??? I hoped for a sign... but nothing was there... is there life after death??? Is there a meaning to death???
If He is all controlling, then why would he deprive a young life that He created, of the joys of a long and happy life??? I wonder now what our purpose on earth is. Was his purpose fulfilled that he had to die?? What is my purpose ??? Am I actually working towards my purpose??? Does anyone know the answers???

How many roads must a man walk down,
before you call him a man?
How many seas must a white dove fly,
before she sleeps in the sand?
And how many times must a cannon ball fly,
before they're forever banned?

The answer my friend is blowing in the wind,
the answer is blowing in the wind.

How many years can a mountain exist,
before it is washed to the sea?
How many years can some people exist,
before they're allowed to be free?
And how many times can a man turn his head,
and pretend that he just doesn't see?

The answer my friend is blowing in the wind,
the answer is blowing in the wind.

How many times must a man look up,
before he sees the sky ?
And how many ears must one man have,
before he can hear people cry ?
And how many deaths will it take till we know,
that too many people have died?

The answer my friend is blowing in the wind,
the answer is blowing in the wind.

The answer my friend is blowing in the wind,
the answer is blowing in the wind.

-Bob Dylan.

Saturday, March 12, 2005

Sweet Child of mine

It was his second year in Surathkal and he was still one of those well oiled nerds trying to get to the top of the class… lol!!! It was his fourth semester to be precise… We had a certain lab called AEC Lab. It was one of those things that never ever give an output. Besides considering his attendance in that lab he didn’t even harbour any hopes of getting an output… yet deep inside he somehow felt he knew the theory enough to squeeze his way through…
It was the middle of May and the exams were on… He had stayed up the whole night trying to cram the unnecessary details…
“Abbe… maa**** woh capacitor ka value kya tha be???”
“Oye mereko nahi pata yaar… mereko bhi is experiment ka output nahi aaya…”
“Abbe is experiment aayega to mera vaat lag jayega yaar”
“Jo bhi hoyege dekha jayega… sutta keliye aayege kya???”
“Abhe bho**** main to aaj mar jaoonga yaar”
He somehow managed to go through all the experiments… He was confident that even if he did not get an output he would smash the viva and write enough theory to clear the paper … But there was still that particular experiment… hell what is the probability of getting that experiment yaar… one in thirteen… worth a chance ditching it… howzaat???
It seemed the most logical thing to do… ditch that experiment… so ditch he did!!!
7 am and he was haunting the surroundings of the AEC Lab. Somehow he was strangely confident that he would get thought the lab without any major scars…
The system is strange… they keep the question papers hidden in the answer sheets and we were to randomly pick up any of those answer booklets… smarty that he was he decided to have the first pick…
" Design an RC Coupled amplifier… gain of… bandwidth of… components… …. … "
He couldn’t believe it… It was that friggin question that he hadn’t studied for at all.. he could see his entire family ( dads great grand dad included) abusing him … he felt like abusing them back loudly but I believe sensibility returns when its most unlikely… lol!!!!
He tried his hand at copying… he raced as fast as he could towards the one girl who couldn’t have possibly ditched it…
“You are the best woman ive ever set my eyes upon… please please tell me atleast the values of the components and il manage to write up an infinite deal of garbage”
“Shhh…. What a freak… 10pF , 22uF ,……….. give me your sheet I’ll write the formulae in pencil… use it somewhere”
“Oh …. You are a sweetheart… Thanks a million man… that ba***** is coming back … me scooting… Cadburys after exam…”
Now he had the answer.. no one could fail him… he felt a strange sense of whatever… He was on my way… lol!!!! He confidently went to his place … wrote an infinite deal of nothing inserting those formulae in conspicuous locations and making the presence of those magical numbers felt…
He submitted the paper and hurriedly rushed towards the attendant for the apparatus…. “10 picofarad” , he proudly said… and looked around … we nodded at him as if to say.. “way to go”.. atleast that’s what he thought…
Soon he was at his table trying to set up the circuit… an hour passed and then another… hope to despair is quite a long journey man … he was feeling really stupid… nothing that he tried seemed to be having an impact. He was at his wits end when he could hear , “Roll number 999… come for viva…”, he got up and walked slowly towards the external examiner…
“what is the bandwith that you have designed this for???”
“sir, 200 Mhz sir…”
“200 Mhz ?”
“Yes sir but i think it will work only for about 150 Mhz”
“150 Mhz??!!!???”
“ Sir the coupling capacitor…”
“No … answer to the point… what is this circuit's operating range??”
“ Sir in the formula I have substituted… 200 …”
“Ok son… that’s all ok… are you getting the output???”
“No sir”
“It isn’t really surprising… look at the circuit… do you see anything missing”
He felt like beating up the bald man … If he knew th answer, would he be mumbling…
“ Cant see the mistake sir…”
“ This is what is wrong with the younger generation I say… they refuse to tackle the problem… everything they need has to be given to them on a platter… “
“yes sir “
“what yes sir”
“sorry sir… “
More blah…
“yes sir”
“what??”
“no sir… sorry sir..”
Then the old man asked him the question that probably saved his subject..
“How much did you score in the theory last semester?”
“sir 82 sir…”
“ah… so u sill don’t see the mistake eh…”
He pretended to stare at the sheet and mumbled all the formulae including E=mc2 hoping to impress the professor… of course he made sure that the bald man dint hear anything he mumbled…

“Can I see your circuit??”
“Yes of course sir…”
He casually walks towards the breadboard… examines the mess of wires….
“Son you should be a little more judicious with these wires u know… you have used such long wires for these small connections… Its no wonder that you have overlooked something… well the circuit seems right although the one you’ve drawn is a little different…”
Our man was surprised… I mean how could he rig up a circuit correctly when he had no clue about it at all considering that the circuit that he copied was wrong…. He simply nodded nevertheless…
Well it was well past three hours now and he asked him to submit his paper.. He told him that he couldn’t take any readings…
The old man said, “Well I don’t know… lets see … its not that difficult an experiment..”
“yes sir… something is wrong…”
And he walked out of the hall… It was the first time he thought hed fail in a paper… Not a nice feeling… When he got outside all of us sympathized with him at having gotten such a difficult question…
“They’ll clear you man… uve got the circuit right…”
“But goddam it ive drawn it wrong in the sheet..”
“They’ll pass you man… don’t worry”
Nothing could console him…
Someone once had told him that beer is mans best friend when hes all down… so Mr.Beer beckoned him…
He went all alone to this place in Mangalore about 20 kilometres away… got himself drunk silly and somehow managed to get back to the hostel.I being his roommate was really surprised because I had never seen him drink in the two years I knew him… He just walked in with his typical ceaseless smile , grabbed my guitar and started screaming “sweet child of mine…”
We all welcomed another intelligent man who had been ruined by education into our community of “light drinkers” ….

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Kaam Tamam

I was sitting in my cubicle and pondering over a problem when I get a call from one of my friends ...
“ Oye… ******* kya kar rahe ho”
“ generally just… “
“just wondering if we can scoot to mysore tomorrow… getting bored… “
“how about tonight???”
There was just a moment of silence before what I had said dawned on us…

“Il be at your place in an hours time”
“Sure”
He hung up… I quickly found excuses and raced towards home… I Just had time enough to have a quick shower when I could hear his car screeching to a halt before my house…

A few cds, a couple of spare clothes… a few chocolates… n we were off on our way…
We decided to drag along another friend , lets call him Tamam.

We called him up on our way to his house and told him our plans… we had decided to drag him along at any cost… He seemed shaken up by the entire plan and tried to come up with excuses for each of which we had our own ridiculous counter – excuses…

“Oye.. were goin mysore… get dressed….”
“what dya mean”
“oye we know ur hardly wearing anything at this hour of the night… and watching some mallu pondy “
“Abbe… that’s ok.. what mysore…”
“just get dressed … we wil be there in 10 minutes”
“WTF????”
“yeah….”


In ten minutes we were outside his huge house…. Our man comes out to receive us in his pajamas and sweater.. man all that was missing was a monkey cap… It would’ve made a perfect goorkha picture… he tried sheepishly to give excses…
“Abbe kal mereko meeting hain yaar… nahin aa paoonga”
“what time is the meeting”
“sharp 8 o clock maccha…”
“don’t worry… you will be in office by 8am”
“WTF??? What ..”
“chill… go wear atleast ur undies… we gotta leave now..”
“Abbe maa***** I have work tomorrow”
“ba*** to your work… were leaving now… if you don’t step out now… were gonna start screaming ur lover babes name… she stays in the opposite building right???”
We could see the jimmy wince in discomfort…
He tried a few more excuses before he came up with the ultimate mother of all…
“Speak to my daddy… me good boy… wont go without daddys aashirvaard!!!!”
We confidently walked into his house… I was almost sure I would be able to work my magic with his parents… but one step into the house… n it spelt doom…
Uncle was in a murderous mood… one look and we knew what to expect… We could see Tamam jumping around in delight while we were wriggling uncomfortably…
“Tamam wont be going out tonight.. he has fever… when I last checked it was 98.1 degrees… besides he had running nose last week… “
“Ok uncle… yeah I guess he must stay home… it might get worse…”
“Why don’t you guys go upstairs and talk for a while… “
“yes uncle”
We put our heads down and walked into Tamams room… as expected he was watchin one of those movies and… we gave him ideas like eloping with us… considering his tendencies im sure he would’ve been considerably excited n all… but he kept his thoughts to himself and told us to wait in his room while he went for his customary leaks… ive known this freak of nature for over a decade now but ive never been able to explain his bladder problems… he had a reasonably tight one before he developed pimple problems and his mommy got a laser surgery done on his nose… God alone knows what the doctor did but although his pimples weren’t to be seen for a almost a week his bladder (im not talking gall bladder) seemed to have lost considerable strength. By the time he reappeared we stowed away his company swipe card in a pile of books and shouted goodbye…
When we got to the car we were still wondering how that freak could possibly prefer “nice” movies to a long night drive..
The journey was a pleasant one … we were almost halfway into Kengeri when we got a call from a rather shaken up Tamam …
“Hey did u guys see my swipe card anywhere..”
“Hell yeah… its with us … dammit!!!!”
“grrrrr… brrrrrr… mrrrrrr…”
“what happened???”
“I don’t believe you guys are my friends…”
“We don’t believe you ditched us…”
“You actually have my…”
“Yeah.. well be back tomorrow morning… Just look around… u might just find it somewhere there..”
and I could no longer hear the soothing background music from his dads transistor…

We carried on.. the journey was amazing… good music… good conversation and mild traffic… so we generally proceeded towards Mysore at a reasonable speed. We were running out of ideas when we get another call from out Tamam!!!
“B****** ur coming back rt now n returning the card to me… WTF is wrong with you guys… “
The tone was not one of anger … it was a confused tone.. totally confused… almost begging for us to return his card…
We couldn’t help laughing out aloud.In fact we had to stop the vehicle so that we could laugh without danger… and all the while our dear Tamam is letting loose a tirade of abuses…
We could literally hear the relief he felt when we told him that his card was in his house only …
After we hung up… we carried on.. One stop at CafĂ© Coffee Day … and within a couple of hours we were in Mysore…
One amazing trip… in every sense of the word!!!!!

Saturday, March 05, 2005

White Flag -Dido

I know you think that I shouldn't still love you,
I'll tell you that.
But if I didn't say it, well I'd still have felt it
where's the sense in that?

I promise I'm not trying to make your life harder
Or return to where we were

Well I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be

I know I left too much mess and
destruction to come back again
And I caused but nothing but trouble
I understand if you can't talk to me again
And if you live by the rules of "it's over"
then I'm sure that that makes sense

And when we meet
Which I'm sure we will
All that was then
Will be there still
I'll let it pass
And hold my tongue
And you will think
That I've moved on....

Well I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be

Well I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be

What a beautiful song!!! what a lovely message... yeah I dont give up!!!! Yeah i get knocked... but im up again .. No ur never gonna see me down...

Dream on!!!! It wont change a thing!!!!!

Everything is so bloody cosy in feigned reality … Its not even half as harsh… everything u want to own is up for grabs. Everything that happens is a choice we’ve made… and something we look forward to...

Reality is a bitch!!! Consider this… The woman of your dreams politely tells you that you aren't the one for her… but that you're a wonderful person… you are not just depressed... you're hurt where it hurts the most.. the lil son of an ego takes a bashing!!!

More alcohol???? Deep inside you know that this is not gonna change reality… it still will remain that you are a loser… You have just lost the girl who was the source of your inspiration… After all she was the one who carved the niche you tried to fit in… Now that you weren't even close… you feel like theres nothing left on this world which will be a motivation… nothing else to look forward to…

“will there ever be someone in my life who will match this babe… will there ever be someone who will be able to command respect and love like this sweet dame…”

That’s when I decided its time that reality neednt control me… I live my life the way I want to… I may not be the one for her… yet she could be the one for me… this belief makes me believe that im happy with her … I spend all my time with her… I assume that she loves me as much … This is what I feel… that I can live in a world of dreams… of lions and princesses … shunning reality… hoping that the dreams wont come crashing down… If nothing im happy … Shes what i want to live for... shes mine in my dreams... I dream on!!!

Ironic - Thank you Alanis

An old man turned ninety-eight
He won the lottery and died the next day
It's a black fly in your Chardonnay
It's a death row pardon two minutes too late
Isn't it ironic ... don't you think

It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought ... it figures

Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly
He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids good-bye
He waited his whole damn life to take that flight
And as the plane crashed down he thought
'Well isn't this nice...'
And isn't it ironic ... don't you think

Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything's okay and everything's going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up
In your face

It's a traffic jam when you're already late
It's a no-smoking sign on your cigarette break
It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife
It's meeting the man of my dreams
And then meeting his beautiful wife
And isn't it ironic... don't you think
A little too ironic... and yeah I really do think...

Life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
Life has a funny, funny way of helping you out
Helping you out


So true dont u think... everytime u think everythings going so perfectly... i wonder whats in store for me... and im never failed.... something has to go wrong... and thinking of the entire episode at a later stage... the happiness seems so strange... so fake... isnt it so goddam ironic... :)

Monday, February 28, 2005

PINK!!!!!!!! :)

It was a lazy Saturday afternoon… I was still groveling on my bed wondering if it was late enough to wake up… I heard someone say…
“Damn its woken up”…
I lazily turned around to see my sister - that stupid thing - yelling something at me…. What was she doing in my room??? How dare she yell at me in my room… I felt like a taunted lion n all… (don’t ask me where that feeling comes from… lol!!!) I could now hear not just her ... My mom was also yelling…
“Don’t u have classes now??? Its one already and look at you… “
I slowly got to my feet but I was still wondering what that wicked lil thing was doing in my room. I just needed a reason to land my fist on her face… I figured she was rummaging through my wardrobe….
“What the hell do you think you are doing?”
“Im looking for my Pink top”
I was getting a little unnerved…
“Pink top???? What the frig are u looking for a pink top in my cupboard for?”
“You stole my Levis remember… and my Pepe Shirt… that nice one… “
“Oye… I didn’t steal ‘em… I had asked mommy… “
“My foot u asked mommy… “
“ Well that still dosent explain why ur looking in my cupboard for pink tops???”
“You never know…”
I could feel myself slowly but surely losing it… I had gotten my clothes ironed n arranged neatly … and now I could see them all strewn all over the place…
“Oye you better clear up the mess…”
“You better return my pink top”
I tried to reason….
“What will I do with Your goddam pink top???? “
“Wear it…” and then one stupid characteristic grin…
hehe!!!! That was it!!!
My room was the battlefield for the modern battle of Panipat… one man striving to save his room and the opponent trying to salvage a pink top or whatever… grrrr!!!!
It started with loud squeals… then screams… I was knocked a couple of times on my face… I wasn’t sleepy anymore… a couple of scratches … I was burning within… surprisingly none of my punches seemed to be having any effect on her… It mustve been her favourite pinkie… lol!!!
It went on until the referee , my mom intervened… she wielded a broom and had an angry look… I knew that if I hadn’t stopped then… I would be the first to be attached … Somehow all elder brothers end up on the wrong side…
Peace ensued in no time… both of us tails down… I had to clear up my room … while my sister had to leave without her pink top lol!!!!
Some battle this was… My sister seemed to be feeling the pain now… she was rubbing her cheeks while I felt a strange satisfaction… Needless to say the scratches from her talons were hurting like crazy but I tried to be the brave man…
Some beginning to the day!!!!! God I love my punching bag!!!

Fools .... we all!!!!!!!!

Scene 1: 12:05 pm (deadline at 12:00 noon)

I cant really describe that feeling in words … it wasn’t one of pain… it wasn’t uneasiness… it could at best be understood as the longing of a man to empty his swollen sack. Think about it… the system of yours is begging you to free it of its woes and your mind chooses to put off the inevitable for some auspicious moment…
“Damn you … cant u just get back to ur damned coding after relieving urself??”
“Self control is important … wait on for sometime…. Once were done with this package .. u can unload as much as u want….”
“Damn the self control… I cant take it much longer .. u know it!!!”
“Dude … chill maadi… cant u just hang on for a minute without troubling me so much. I cant think half as well when u do this to me… Its only gonna take longer… Chill for a while”
“You cant damn think and I cant damn hold on for too much longer…”
“You know… a perfectionist is one who strives to exceed his limits…”
“Damn ur perfection… think natural… look its not gonna hold too long… you had better be warned…”
“Damn u .. u son of a freak… i cant get leave this place without having that darn thing finished… cant u friggin understand…”
“Alright … THIS IS IT… don’t blame me if …. 5…4…..3….”
This was the moment when the mind had to yield to the bladder…. Damn it…“The call” has to be answered … it just HAS TO BE ANSWERED… is there anyone who can refute this???? ANYONE????
I got up and ran to the rest room…

Scene 2: 7:30 pm

Its a lot clearer now… No more pressure …no more tension… Having literally battled with the work over the last few weeks, the “nothing to do” feeling was a lil difficult to handle… browsing… mailing… chatting… I was generally a lil bored….
I decided to visit the restroom one last time before I left for the day… I got up and ambled casually into the rest room… As I was about to walk out of the loo….. I could hear some heavy footsteps heading towards me from the other side of the door… Being prone to accidents I decided to play it safe and stepped back… Boy!!! was that a good move or what…. The man who raced inside would’ve literally flattened me …. He came in hurriedly… Even before he was inside the heavenly abode of such tortured souls his fly was wide open … he stormed into the limited space like a bull… As he relieved the sensation ( he later put it that way) … I was just wondering why he would torture himself so much… I waited for him outside the loo… He raced past me with much the same speed… I called out for him and asked me why he was in a hurry… From a distance he replied “ Abbe das minute main submit karna hain…” and kept running…


I walked out of the place wondering what a fool I would’ve made of myself that morning... How many fellows wouldve seen me running... Would they have understood??

Damn!!!! What fools, work makes of us!!!!!!

Thursday, January 27, 2005

DUH!!!!!! Some life this!!!!

It’s been some time now since I’ve been thinking… “Is this what I really want to do? Stare at the goddam monitor hoping for a miracle …”
Am I cut out for this… Is this what I’ve studied for twenty years of my life… And frankly I still have no clue… I’m as confused as ever n it only gets worse..
Walking down that lane trying to figure out where I went wrong… the answer still eludes me… was it when I chose science over arts?? Was it when I topped school n chose to do engineering in electronics or was it when I chose to do my engineering in erstwhile KREC???
While in college, the picture of a software engineer that was presented to me was that of a hi-flying, hi-earning, well dressed, polite and “all-having” demi god!! Now I see the things that were not visible in the picture… the stress, deadlines, peer pressure, expectations and more deadlines…
Staring at a goddam picture tube for at least ten hours out of the possible twenty four, trying to discover those damned bugs and cleansing the code of all unrighteousness… duh!!!! Some life!!!!!
I cant imagine doing this all my life… presenting some ragged piece of code.. convincing my seniors that this is the best that ever was… and then basking in the glory of my helplessness..
Yes this is life my friend… I know it aint what I set off to become.. but having become just what I dint want to .. im waiting for the miracle… Yes there is hope … It keeps me alive..

Thursday, January 20, 2005

Merry Christmas

Date: 19th December 2003
Time : 4:30pm

Jack is rudely woken up from his afternoon siesta by a mighty splash of water wetting his face … Jumping outta his bed he realizes his mom is screaming.. “Ur the santa for the evening… u better leave now… The Christmas party is at 5”.. It takes a while before things begin to clear up… and the wetness begins to sink in…
A quick shower later, hes all ready to leave to church … the red cloak and santa beard safely stacked up in his huge backpack… “It’s the season to be jolly”… yea.. it was his first time as Santa and he was really excited about the entire experience … He didn’t want to miss a moment of the fun… So hurriedly he got all dressed up and set off…
The kine needed a wash real bad… however the dirty kine wasn’t gonna stop him.. he was the santa… the heart throb of the lil kids and they were waiting for him at church… lol!!! He couldn’t keep them waiting for long could he???
Within a few minutes he was on the main road galloping away…
A few meters away…he could see a big man … he was waving out his finger… or whatever… he obviously wanted a lift… The main bus stand was still some distance away.. and it was a very very hot afternoon.. Under normal circumstances even the sight of a man all tired n sweating wouldn’t have moved him enough to give him a lift… but it was the Christmas season… and more importantly he was the santa for the day… He couldn’t but stop his kine..
A big grin … a hop , skip n jump… the two were riding away…
“Whats your name??”
“Jack… as in Jackass”
There was some silence… then another question…
“can you drop me off at the main bus stand”…
“Of course… no problemo..”
The road ahead was pretty good … there were no potholes… no speed breakers… Jack was getting late for the party… he stepped up the speed… “The man is big… really big… he wondered as he struggled to maneuver the bike…
They reached a curve where Jack couldn’t really see anything ahead of him… He heard a loud sound… he was wondering what it could be… IT WAS A BIKE HEADING STRAIGHT AT HIM … That dormant brain of his couldn’t come up with anything else but a picture of superman jumping off a skyscraper.. this thanks to a movie he had seen earlier.. A moment of insanity later… Jack was on the footpath…he had jumped off the bike straight for the footpath.. some magnetic effect … he landed face first on the footpath… back on the road was an entangled mass of vehicles ….and men struggling to get out of the mess…
Before he could comprehend what had really happened he noticed a white rod popping out of his knee n sayin “hello… thanx for screwin up”… A moment of shooting pain n he passed out…
Jack regained consciousness in a hospital… The red cloak was the first thing he noticed…
A huge woman dressed in white said “ Santas gonna need an operation..Merry Christmas anyways”
“Merry Christmas”, He said n returned to his sleep….


Ps: any resemblance to anyone living or dead… (luckily living actually) is purely intended…

Tuesday, January 18, 2005

totally arbit!!!!

One of the things that has always managed to keep my mind occupied is the quest to figure out something that isnt already figured... At last i did it... I came up with something that (i seriously hope )hasnt already been thought about .... BEER FLAVOURED MILK... strange as it may seem.. think about it ... would it not be a huge success... hmmm.... (tryin to look intellectual n all)
Ok look at it this way.. its healthy.. (milk is healthy .. anyone who thinks otherwise??? (looking menacingly)) its got the flavour of beer... now that IS nice...
Mommas boys can also go to the pubs boldly n order for beer milk... YES THEY CAN!!! n momma will appreciate her sonny for going to a pub.. ever heard of that??
The "bad" boys also have reason to smile ... if they do prefer beer to beer flavoured milk... n go back home ... tehy can always say that they were smelling of milk... lol!!!
It will be cheap... wont leave lasting effects.. n will serve the purpose...
NOW THAT IVE GIVEN U GUYS THE IDEA... WHY DONT U PRESS UR ASS TO SOME WORK AND COME UP WITH A MIND BLOWING FORMULA...
did some one say the end is near??? No im not drunk!!!


arbit... totally... Posted by Hello

Saturday, January 15, 2005

man !! did college life rock!!

Well, lookin back now... it seems like only a couple of months back when I joined that amazing place called KREC ...and now after having passed out of there ... it seems like im missing some of the most fascinating days of my life...
I can still remember the day when i geekily marched into the huge campus ,adjusted my glasses and wondered how i would spend 4 years in that place... its seemed like eternity then... it seemed longer when i had my first look at my "room to be"... one semi rusted metal cot ... one table with a missing drawer ... one cupboard with absolutely no shelves inside... it dint make too much of a pretty sight :)The look on my face could easily be translated to "What the ..." ..."How in the world am i supposed to survive here????" I had a good mind to run away .. back home typez... A look at my roomies .. n i was wondering "hmmm... this is gonna be interesting "The days of "torture" had just begun ... i was convicted for being a geek and sentenced to what i thought was death by rigorous punishment...
The year that followed was absolutely awesaaaaaam considering that i did some things i had never done before n that includes going without a bath for 5days at a stretch in order to avoid the cold water bath... phew!!! there was absolutely no winter... only hot summer n hotter summer.. n in the hottest part of the year it would be a sight tryin to figure which T shirt was still wearable without driving the neighbours olfactory system nuts... The best part was wondering at 6:30 whether to eat or not at the mess... lookin at it now , if nothing else the mess developed some immunity ... i can now eat absolutely anything...
The visits to the beach increased n so did the number of club meetings... the fund collection trips to Mangalore... eating out... getting back late... my life was slowly changing... n i could feel it... I was hardly spending any time in my room...Then came that fateful day when i did badly in certain lab exam and decided to get drunk... that was my introduction to the higher world :) How i managed to return to my room in one piece is something i still cant figure out... well i then grabbed my guitar and screamed "sweet child of mine" much to my room mates dismay .. the whole hostel knew that there was another newbie to the world of alcohol!!!!!With more bad exams and more drinking ...
I figured that something had to be done about the hangovers.. i figured that orange juice was all i needed... so it was an amazing set up... accolol at night n orange juice n the morning... twas total fun!!!Then came the placements and all the tension that comes along with it... now tension is bad n somethng had to be done about it... one instant solution was the "sutta" ... besides it wasnt half as expensive as alcohol... so it was "welcome holy smoke"... well it it seemed like God himself came down n made chai for all the tension ridden guys in the form of Krishna... man did his chai rock the place... one half chai n kings... 6 rupees main din ban jaata...:) ...
Placements were over .. but my trips to Krishnas didnt stop... Who can stay away from God yaar...The final year was like heaven... n every single day i remember wondering how il ever get used to not stayin in a hostel after i left the place... occassional attending classes... loadsa getting drunk... tonnes of trippy music... trips... fests... hmmm..... that was final year...Trips to goa.. sleeping on the beach stoned... staring at couples makin out ... hopin that some day my time will come... lol!!! that was some existance...
The last few days in college are still fresh in my mind.. i could only hear "FRIENDS FOREVER" playin in every room... i was drinkin more alcohol han water.. the final exams were only a formaility... i dont think anyone ever studied... I learnt how to write exams with absolutely no preparation... n yet score lol!!!!
Well exams got over n it was a huge GAME OVER for me....The trip back home was the longest ever ... i felt like my wings were clipped ... now this was punishment... WHY??????????????
Neways ... lookin at it now...I cannot see any similarity between the geek who walked into college n the nut who walked out... twas 4 years of total masti... total fun.... il never hav so much fun again... DAMN!!! DID COLLEGE LIFE ROCK !!!!