The pound of flesh!!!
please carry on at your own peril!!!
Of late I haven’t had the opportunity to blog. But this incident truly deserves a mention…
One bright and sunny morning, Jonnie decide to go to the city. Now city is a good 30 km from our college … so going to the city is like a really time consuming and painful ritual. His cellphone was behaving badly. So he decided to hand it over to the “cellphone clinic”.
Javed, the friendly shopkeeper looks at the phone, “Saab, the IC itself is gone. You will have to change it. I have it ready with me. Come back at
“Accha… cool hain…
Jonnie remembered that his friends were celebrating life by drinking all day on that day. He decided to join them. A little small talk… a little wine… the spirits beginning to soar... and the clock strikes
“Faaaak… Mera cellphone lana hain… il be back in sometime… leave some wine… damn just when I was beginning to feel nice… “ *mumble mumble*…
“Sirji… er… aapka cellphone Mumbai beja hoon… shaam tak vapas aajayega…”
“Kya hua..”
“Ek chota sa component kharab ho
“Shaam kab vapas aaoo??”
“
*mumble mumble*
“Bastard sent my phone to Mumbai …”
“What the fuck for???”
“Some bloody component…”
“So he could’ve got the component sent here..”
“Er… dint strike me… but WTF!!! Il get it in a couple of hours… Sheily will call only at night so its fine”
“Cheers.. “
The clock struck 7.
“Holy Mother of Christ!!!! Its seven… that fellow told me to collect my cellphone… If the bugger shuts his shop… I’m screwed…”
“Bhaiya!!! Hogaya kya..”
“Saab… Abhi tak vapas nahi aaya”
“Kya bol rahe ho… 7 o clock aane ko bola tha… abhi 9 hogaya hain…”
“Sirji… 10 O clock aajaiye … definitely mil jayega…”
“Yaar, I have to go for a party tonight…”
“Saab… aap kal subah collect kijiye…”
“But my friend will call…”
“No problem… Use this Motorola piece for now…”
“Arre… This is like a brick… How will I carry this around”
“Sir.. ek din ki to baat hain …”
“Fuck it!!!! What a life!!!’
TRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR…
“Faaaaaak… I gotta collect the cellphone… Ive got that damn OR lecture in the afternoon… Cant miss it man…”
“What time did he tell you to come?”
“12…”
“Its already 12… u overslept… Your class is at
“FUCK!!! FUCK!!! FUCK!!!”
“ Bhai!!! Hogaya kya??”
“Saab… Kal raat who type puncture ho
“Cellphone main tyre kaise aagaya???”
“Saab… who ladka aapka cellphone leke aaraha tha…
*super puzzled look*
“Now what????”
“Saab… aap ghoomke vapas aajaiye… 3 O clock tak 100% miljayega…”
“Fuck!! There goes my OR class”
“Ok… done with this bloody hopeless movie… I hope the phone is fixed… the slimy SOB… Il eat his head off if he dosent give me the phone now”
Jonnie managed to find an auto to take him to that “cellphone clinic”. He had already spent close to 400 bucks on these arbit trips. Two of those with a brick in his pocket..
“ Arre… Is shop ka malik kaha
“Saab… abhi bahar gaye hain… vapas aajayenge… aap yahan wait kijiye”
“Arre chotu… 4 O clock ho
“Sirji… il call him up…”
“Bhai saab… aap apne darshan karaoge??”
“Aap kaun??”
“Tera baap… saale mera cellphone leke bhaag
“Saab… abhi 10 minute main aajaonga… aapka cellphone ready hain”
“10 minute ke baad main paise nahin doonga”
“
“ Sirji … lo aapka cellphone..”
“Haa.. thank you ji…” and Jonnie began to walk…
“Sirji… 500 hua …”
“Nahi doonga…”
“Dena hi padega”
“Catch me if you can..”
With this Jonnie began to run…
The fellow chased him and jumped on him.
“ Saale, paise nahi dega??”
“Nahi doonga... kutte... kamine maa*****“
They started beating each other up…
Finally the passers by separated them… Jonnie got into an auto and headed back to the bus stop.
His arm was hurting real bad… He unbuttoned his shirt. And lo!!! There was a huge bite on his chest!!!!
The man had bitten off a good half kg off his chest.
Talk about love bites!!!!
Good night!!!!
2 comments:
LOL !!! poor chap !
If only the use of foul expletives could be deleted!!! otherwise neat post.....
ur long lost cousin :-)
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